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July 28, 2006
Words
I have been told, rather often recently, that I don’t write much these days. True. Not because I am too lazy or too busy, nor because I have nothing to say.
Some words are reserved for myself, floating at night in the dark, or coming along with the wind when I pass by St-Laurence river in the morning, or emerging from the steps of my walk at noon, or lingering at my ear in my dream. They are never meant to be displayed on the shelf, never meant to see the ray of daylight.
I see words in the old diary, in the letters that someone once passionately wrote, on the casual paper tearing from some notebook. They exist for that moment, like petals of the flower, so fragile, so vulnerable, so easy to be blown away. Some others are there to be tasted, gorged upon, thought over to survive the days of waiting, the days of fighting in the battlefield, the days of knitting a dream alone…
Sometimes silence is vivid, passionate and dynamic, in the eyes of someone who can read it.
Posted by pengbo at 7:58 PM | Comments (0)
July 23, 2006
Reason to buy flowers
At Jean-Coutu, a guy was ready to pay a bunch of flowers. The cashier smiled and asked:" What did you do wrong to your girlfriend?"
Posted by pengbo at 7:51 PM | Comments (0)
July 17, 2006
Changes
I have been in the new position for two weeks and my VP announced this morning that she will resign from the company. Again, uncertainty. Whose hand our group will be in, what the new vision will be, what change it will have on each individual…uncertain. I was surprised by the news but not very surprised overall with changes. My life has been fairly dramatic in the past six months and I have realized that there are things that you just can’t control. Changes are inevitable. The only thing you can do is to face them and deal with them.
I classify changes into two categories: reactive change and proactive change.
Reactive change happens beyond our control, most likely unexpectedly and we, as human beings naturally resist it at the very beginning. Because it breaks our patterns, it disturbs our routines; it brings uncertainty to our life and it alters our plans. It means that we have to rebuild something, which is not always easy. By nature we are lazy. I often get the comments like: I am too lazy to change a job, too lazy to renovate the house, too lazy to get divorced…they need others (sometimes the situation) to make decision for them, then they will react because they have no choice. e.g if the person is laid off, if the house is leaking heavily, if the other party insists a divorce…
Proactive change, on the other hand, is more voluntary, more planned. It may take long time to make that change happen but it is less shocking. Sometimes it is a judgement or a decision in some difficult situation. They may not have all the information you need, they may not be 100% sure the change will always be positive, but they feel an urge to change, an urge to challenge the status quo.
I remembered some lines from a movie “ Shall We Dance?”
" The rest is up to you." I tell my client. Every few years they come back so I have these snapshots in my head of how they 've changed over the years. The ones who've changed the most finally bought that boat, moved to the island. Those who haven't changed I supposed they take comfort in knowing that course thier lives are on. They like to believe they know what lies ahead.
Posted by pengbo at 7:14 PM | Comments (0)
July 16, 2006
One more minute
I love sleeping and I love sleeping in. If I am forced to get up early I always try to negotiate with myself: One more minute. Does one minute really make the huge difference? Not necessarily in reality but it feels good. We all have the natural tendency to elongate the pleasure from the wonderful moments in life: we will hold our beloved ones one more minute before we have to say good-bye; we will take a look at our old houses one more minute before we leave it; we will stick on the phone just to hear someone’s voice one more minute before we hang up……That one minute is a cushion to a drastic change, an illusion to hang on to the dream that one would not want to let go……
What if we only had one minute in life?
Posted by pengbo at 2:31 PM | Comments (0)
July 8, 2006
Pure bonheur
Posted by pengbo at 1:37 PM | Comments (0)
July 7, 2006
Shanghai上海
Shanghai is always a romantic city in my mind, always related to “Petit Bourgeois”.
However I’ve never really stayed in shanghai, always got a glance then left as if it was always a transition never a destination. For me, Shanghai is a name, a face, a piece of cloud floating in my sky, a vague dream in some half-awake nights……and this time, after 6 years, Shanghai all of sudden, became concrete, clear and real.
Shanghai was a wonderful place for shopping. After my best friend and I arrived, within an hour, I already left 4 pair of sandals at the front desk of the hotel. So in the evening when the guy who came over to fix the TV saw my shoe boxes, “ Ah, you are the lady who has bought a lot of shoes today!” Oooops, I became famous! In the rest of the days in China, I refrained myself from looking at any shoes, it was such a torture!
The fragment of the moments composed a peaceful serene music in my brief stay in Shanghai…the non-gossip chat of three women in the café; the sunny journey to a beautiful small town Wuzhen; the lovely dinner at He Ping Hotel; the Jazz, Michael Learns to Rock, Norah Jones’ New York City, Xiangyang road, those laughter and those laughter with tears…
Shanghai, oddly, after so many years, touched me in a way it never has.
So long Shanghai. I will come again.
Posted by pengbo at 1:45 PM | Comments (0)